master anzawa. crap scan, checkerboard pattern not in original. uploaded to see if maybe those annoying blue dots were just on my view and not the file itself. guess they're really there.

Downloaded Google Chrome a few days ago. It's fast, it's cool, but the minimalist thing feels insubstantial. Google said they want Chrome to be transparent; you don't see the browser, you just see the website on the other side. But it's like driving a car and all you see is the windshield, I want to see the instrument panel too, I want a frame that gives me context. Basically I want the progress bar, watching those little cubes go across the bottom of the browser is like a deep Zen thing. And Java seems weird, I play with a Java chess program that works fine on Firefox but just shows blank on Chrome even after I donwnloaded the latest Java that it wanted.

Current setup:

Asus EeePC 701 4gig notebook, running Windows XP
Secondhand CRT monitor I got from the girlfriend
Big black Dell keyboard that plugs into USB
Huawei E160 HSDPA USB dongle, running on Globe's Tattoo Broadband prepaid internet
Several flash drives, cameraphone, etc.

While Globe advertises speeds of "up to 2mbps," I've never seen it go over 1mbps on Globe's running speed graph thing. And I wish I could've just stayed with my original Linux OS, but that just really wasn't compatible with the connection.

Watched Star Trek a few days ago, disappointed. Not horrible, but underwhelming. Weird combination of reboot and tribute, alternate timeline to escape baggage, but a redshirt is quickly killed, there's "I'm giving her all she's got," feels like mistaking the superficial for the soul.

Was reading about fairy chess. I wonder if anyone's thought of this before, but how about orthodox chess with specific personalities, identities, names, for all the pieces. I always had trouble with how stark and abstract chess is, but I like the situationality of strategy videogames.

Black hat, white hat.

Watched Slumdog Millionaire the other week, was pretty good but still kinda unsatisfying. To console myself I started re-reading Rudyard Kipling's Kim. I guess that was what I had been hoping for from the movie, the big panoramic sweep.

I had a messageboard once, http://zoneseek.proboards37.com/index.cgi. Link doesn't work anymore, though Google search still shows some results for my old board, "The Memory Palace." Went over to the ProBoards support forum, looked up the FAQ:

Board Deletion?
If you think that your board was deleted, you may have violated the Terms of Service.
Please read the TOS and make sure your board met all the guidelines that you agreed to when you created your forum.
Read The Terms of Service Here
The most common offense is a Foreign Language Violation (Section 3C of the Terms of Service)
Do not post in support if you have violated the TOS. You will not be given back your board or any information that was on your board.

Section 3C of the TOS says: "User's message board and Web site must be in English."

Wow pare, grabe naman, ang daya yata nun, nadugas ako. :-(

Currently reading Harlan Ellison's unfilmed screenplay for I, Robot. As usual, Ellison rants about how Hollywood is stupid, but frankly I don't see that this screenplay is that great, or even good. Granted, this was written back in 1978, but there have been a lot of robot movies since then: Blade Runner, Ghost in the Shell, Bicentennial Man, Animatrix, Spielberg's AI. It's like Philip K. Dick's original Do Androids Dream of Electric Sheep, when you look at it now, this ground's been covered, it's passe.

Shaving your girlfriend's head does odd things to a fanboy's mind. It was her idea. Images flash: Delerium of the Endless, David Lynch's Bene Gesserit, Sinead O'Connor. Britney.

Currently reading Peter F. Hamilton's The Neutronium Alchemist and The Naked God.

Saw the Watchmen movie last week, loved it. Bought the trade paperback the day after. The purists tend to sneer at Snyder, but I'm glad I saw the movie before I read the comics.

I'm going through my old journals, typing them up on the computer and consigning the hardcopies to the flames.

About 2 weeks ago, bought a CD of Studio 60 on the Sunset Strip, and idly asked if they had the West Wing. Didn't expect that they'd have it, but they did; boxed set, all 7 seasons. And the Sorkin-fest continues, haven't watched everything yet.

Just back from Antipolo, went swimming with people from work. Still can't swim, but making some progress, the girlfriend's teaching me.

Got your moment of Zen right here.

Commuting home, blasting mind-crushing J-pop into my ears, saw this odd shirt on the woman in front of me and snapped some pics. How does one organize an international organization of slum-dwellers, one wonders? Smoke signals? Video-conferencing?

As You Like It was on HBO, watched it about 3 times so far. Bryce Dallas Howard's delightful as Rosalind.

Yay, got the Asus Eee 4gig agin, way cheaper now. Posting from Via Mare at SM cos they have free wifi. And have a Sony Ericsson K530i phone. Also now broke.

My phone was stolen, asshat thief snatched it out of my hand and ran. Geh. New phone and number maybe tomorrow.

Got an email from Blogged.com, "Our editors recently reviewed your blog and have given it a 7.9 score out of (10) in the Personal Blogs category of Blogged.com.
This is quite an achievement!" Well, ok then.

Looks like blogging from the phone still doesn't work. It's not the code salad anymore, but prev blank post was supposed to be a pic. Working out a tedious kluge, transfer pics from phone memory card to usb reader, la di dah. Otherwise I'm having fun with the N70, I ganked like 4gigs of mp3s from a friend of mine, and I've listened to most of it. Then my desktop monitor died. :\

Got a Quantum of Solace cd, and the street hawker threw in season 1-3 of Avatar the Last Airbender for a discount. The new Bond was kinda meh, but dang, Avatar rawks. I watched the first few eps way back when, no big deal. But it's a wonderful thing, so rare on tv, a reverse shark-jump, where a blah series turns into something extraordinary.

I don't believe in destiny, or karma. We scrabble along the earth, finding what joy we can, and precious little of that. But sometimes, sometimes, I can almost believe that things work out. I have one true thing in my life, and it's mine, and hers. Sometimes I feel apprehensive, wondering how things will go wrong, as they so often do. But then I stand in the moment, in the stress of her regard, and it burns away my cynicism.

Thinking of changing the blog name to "Between Iron and Silver." Hannibal Lecter reference, and in honor of the amazing girl I'm dating. In other news, the Motorola died, got a Nokia N70 music edition. I have a bunch of ideas and titles I'd like to hammer into coherent blog post form when I can find the time.

She is amazing. She's bossy, she cares, she walks fast, and I trail behind this impossible, incogruous, unlikely little spitfire, my heart going pitter-pat.

Hadouken emoticon: ~o

Came up with this in a chat earlier. Variations:

Hadouken: -{ ~o)
Shinkuu hadouken: -{ ~=0)
Kamehameha: -{=====0)

Watched WALL-E and the Clone Wars CG movie. WALL-E was brilliant, with a subtle bite: you don't see the crowds of stupid fat people in the promos. Clone Wars was lame-ass. Should've known better by now, it's all about lowered expectations since Phantom Menace, but Genndy Tartakovsky's amazing Clone Wars animated series was A New Hope.

The Dark Knight was incredible. Whoever plays the Joker next had better bring his A game, Ledger set the bar up in the stratosphere somewhere.

More drinking.

Two books by Greg Egan: Permutation City and Teranesia. Permutation City's been on my wish list for years, as an apparently seminal cyberpunk story. But Teranesia blew me away. An Indian Rationalist couple travels to a tiny nameless Indonesian island to study mutant butterflies. Here they raise two precocious kids who explore the island and study its peculiar fauna, while learning math and biology online via satellite. It's a great exotic setup with a Nick Bantock flavor, and a unique bildungsroman.

Watched House season 4 yesterday. Despairing of ever getting my phone to work with Blogger again.

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testing from email. cell service screwup? html weirdness? gah. supposed to be simple, yet not so simple.

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!@#$%! Normally I send an email from my phone and it shows up here. Not working, see following fruit salad post. Graah.

Went out with some people from work. My boss told me, "I look at you and I see sadness." Heh. I suppose it's characteristic that I get remarks like that, and that I derive great amusement from them.

Summer solstice. Construction people are tearing up and re-paving the street in front of the house. My cellphone's on it's last legs, and I don't want to have it fixed yet again.

Finally found the full-length novel version of Nancy Kress's Beggars in Spain. I have 2 copies of the anthologized novella, and I got the rest of the trilogy years ago.

lol, really?

Chiasson Name Meaning and History
French: derogatory nickname from chiasse ‘excrement’.

Dictionary of American Family Names, Oxford University Press, ISBN 0-19-508137-4
http://www.ancestry.com/facts/Chiasson-name-meaning.ashx

I've read of a chinese adage, that in the course of a long life a wise man will have to abandon his luggage three times. One of those times looms on the horizon. I hope i can grow wise enough in time.

Got Iain M Banks's Matter yesterday. A stray ray of light, otherwise things have not been going well for some time now.

Breaking in new boots. Iffy, but they were dirt-cheap, so I can walk them to pieces. We're still getting to know each other. I feel new calluses starting.

I should break my staff and drown my books, but some things are hard to let go of.

Stuff from the refrigerator tastes of chlorine, like pool water. I wonder if maybe that's a freon leak thing? Also my hard drive died, and need a new PC anyway. Sorrows come not single spies, but in battalions.

Right now my favorite word is "crucible." Appropriately enough. But keeping life interesting doesn't mean making it easy.

Four-poster bed

You and i have unfinished business

Just watched Babel, what crap! Most Gratuitous Use of a Japanese Schoolgirl in a Supposedly Serious Movie. What a ridiculously contrived series of disasters. After a while it's like a lame slasher movie, you know bad things will happen to everyone, no suspense.

Paging sarah connor

In the beginning of Breath of Fire 2, a character steals candlesticks after spending the night in a kindly priest's church. Nice Les Miserables reference. I wish rpgs took more from Victor Hugo, Dickens, Shakespeare. FF Tactics had a bit of a Shakespeare flavor.

Playing Breath of Fire 2 and waiting for the job to start. Got the Hallelujah Chorus stuck in my head, not that i'm complaining.

Last few days, been re-reading donna tartt's The Little Friend and listening to Handel. Harriet in TLF is a little too perfect, the ideal comrade and ally we all wish we had in childhood. The Handel CD i rescued from some junk in the garage. The famous Water Music bit with the trumpets is great, but i'm enthralled by the eerie first menuet in the Fireworks.

Double checked, my pulse is at 62 beats per minute, a new personal record. Low is good, especially given my coffee intake.

Had a strange dream where the main characters from ff6 were avatars of william blake's four zoas.

Before Ghost in the Shell, there was

When prompted for a single-digit multiplication problem, people seem to favor 9 × 7, which is of course 63. I wonder if the mentalists know about this.

Taipei has what i've longed for for years, a big 24-hour bookstore. The libraries of night.

Hit and run Barbie

I guess a big part of my life is about being a Toreador slowly turning into a Ventrue, and resenting it, wondering if i could change back. Feels like settling for second prize.

I put up a poster on the wall slightly crooked. It's making me crazy restless but i'm gonna leave it that way to see how long i can stand it. And maybe i can put the tension to good use.

Bad nights and worse ramen. Globe's gprs signal sucks now, might switch to smart. Also switching from flickr to photobucket.

Chili oatmeal. I'm a genius.

I pwn j00

Got an email from DoingFine.org, http://doingfine.org, saying they want to advertise on my blog. While money = good, I'm naturally suspicious. I don't see how a free messagebard, just a few weeks old, can generate revenue to justify paid advertising.

I am doing okayish, but I've learned to be wary, because life can go from fine to fubar just like that. Now let's go help some nice Nigerians with their cashflow problems...

I heart Mad Labs. So funny, which is refreshing in a science show. Beakman's World from back in the day was good too.

Found some old ham in the freezer- i think this stuff was from christmas- and it's completely tasteless.

Diablo cody is an awesome name. I haven't seen any of this year's oscar movies.

80th oscars. Man, i've missed jon stewart.

Rubik's cube. Impatiently taking it apart in 3... 2... 1...

reverted to classic template, but multipy still doesn't seem to see it

Wrong, robert-houdin didn't die doing a bullet catch. Damn.

Can't sleep from the fear. Been a long time since i had an angst episode. This is it, the heart of darkness that can't be shared.

Am i smarter than a fifth grader? Yes, by god. If i couldn't answer how many sides does a trapezoid have, i'd have to fall on my sword.

Multiply testing tres. Is not working. Geh.

Multuply testing dos

Multiply testing uno

multiply crosspost testing

Ehric weiss took his stage name from the magician Robert Houdin, who died doing a bullet catch.

The Prestige, loved it. Hugh jackman's lefthanded. Always watch the hands.

Book posers, people who walk around with books, it's always either Memoirs of a Geisha, Snow Falling on Cedars, or one of the Potter books.

GRAAGH! STILL stuck in FRIGGIN TRAFFIC when i should've been home HOURS AGO. I'm utterly exhausted but there's still stuff i wanted to get to today. NEVER get a ride from the father person again. To reiterate, AARRGH!

Memoirs of a Geisha is chick flick ne plus ultra

They scanned my grandparents handwritten love letters from 1945, and i copied the files. It's like historical Griffin and Sabine.

I am drunk. What's a wake without a bender?

Bardo twilight zone. Death, grief, lack of sleep, but things have to be decided and arrangements made.

Unintended pron

Current clutter on my table: monitor, keyboard, karen the asus notebook, box of files, clipboard, coffee mug with dregs of chocolate oatmeal, airsoft pistol, rubber gloves, scissors, bottle of soap, keys on swiss knife keychain, bag of noodles from grocery, 3 different computer cables, tape measure, scotch tape, belt, emery board, nail cutter, electric bill, old toothbrush, this cellphone, and 15 books in several piles.

Bloodsugar magik. Feel the burn. I'm running out of places to walk to, and i've been wandering pretty far afield.

I can't remember the name of the 50s diner that used to be on Quezon Avenue, with the waitresses on rollerskates. Good lasagna there. Gone now.

Reading Poppy Z Brite's Liquor, it's pretty good. I didn't know that New Orleans has a Perdido Street. I wonder what Brite thought of China Mieville's second book?

Sam Shepard's Cruising Paradise and Chris Paling's Morning All Day

Fortune cookie says "You must learn to forgive others in order to be forgiven yourself."I don't ask for forgiveness, or expect it

Book-binge weekend before i seriously look for work next week. Poppy Z Brite's Liquor. Like the old days, walking all over the city, scrounging for good cheap paperbacks and feeling guilty

Score! Don Winslow's The Death and Life of Bobby Z, made me laugh so hard i saw purple spots.

Slasher sushi

Yep, haddon and vos savant are right on the odds. My reasoning is different, but i could have worked out that switching doors was the smart move. Bugged me at first that i could be so off, i read up on probability years ago.

Wait no, i think i misunderstood. The reveal shows a goat and effectively removes a door from the selection. I thought you were just told that one of the unchosen doors has a goat

The solution to the monty hall problem in the book is wrong. Felt wrong, doodled a bit to check, definitely wrong.

Reading Mark Haddon's The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night-time. It's truly spooky how much i get this autistic kid, Christopher. I like him: he's more sensible than a lot of people, i can out-nerd him, and i could help him figure things out.